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(Originally posted on my Agony Shorthand blog in 2006)

VARIOUS ARTISTS : “FUZZ CLUB” 7”EP……

The name “Tom Guido” is whispered around these parts (San Francisco) with a mixture of swelling admiration and out-and-out mocking glee. The guy is infamous for being the living embodiment of insane party host “Z-Man” from “Beyond The Valley of the Dolls”, except plied with far more drinks and possessive of far fewer faculties.

His deserved claim to fame is that he turned a series of occasional “club nights” featuring late 80s garage acolyte bands called “The Fuzz Club” into a regular ownership/management gig at The Purple Onion, one of San Francisco’s most famous 1950s-60s comedy & music nightclubs, set smack dab in the middle of North Beach, the entertainment hub of the city at one point (and later the center of the city’s stripping & porn industry). That such a “character” was able to build and nurture such a cool scene around such a great venue was always nothing short of miraculous to me. His inebriated on-stage rants, most often conducted in the middle of a band’s set while they glared at him, featured some of the great ridiculous quotes in rock & roll history, and each night coming home from a Fuzz Club or Onion show was usually spent recounting those gems as much as they were recounting the sets one had seen.

Anyway, I spent a good amount of time at these venues, though I missed a few of the 1989-90 acts documented on this somewhat recent live EP called “Fuzz Club”. DRIVING WHEELS, who I definitely missed, absolutely rip – fast shredding caveman garage, of a par with the pre-lunatic speedburning Dwarves, or the Mummies at their best. If I had made some better entertainment choices in 1989 and not gone to so many friggin’ Thinking Fellers shows or whatever, I might’ve been able to tell you more.

I do remember Guido personally telling me around 1990 or so that I should forget San Francisco, that the “real scene was down in San Mateo” where garage bands like THE MUMMIES, the VANILLA WHORES and WILD BREED were uh, “bred”. All three appear here, but you won’t likely get any whiff of that magickal San Mateo scene of yesteryear, since all 3 are blurry, weak live tape deck versions of bands that were arguably better on record or truly in person (though I could truly care less about the ‘Whores or the Wild Breed).

My favorite of the 7 acts featured here after the Driving Wheels is hands-down THE GAPING WOUNDS, whom I once stumbled upon at the Chatterbox around 1989 or so and never saw nor heard again until this here record. Imagine “Toolin For A Warm Teabag”-era DWARVES with a sneering, pissed-off heroin hottie on vocals instead of Blag Jesus, blowing through a bunch of gnarly ‘core for maybe 10 minutes – oh, and two members actually were in the Dwarves, and around ’89 no one could touch the Dwarves.

So there you have it. I love that my 45 is #423/777 and that it’s personally autographed by Guido himself, but I can’t imagine that anyone outside of European garage collectors and folks who saw one or more of these bands live could ever listen to this thing more than twice. But what do I know?

(postscript – Tom Guido was found, alive and well, in San Francisco just this year (2015) by one of our correspondents)

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http://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/108116399/stream?client_id=3cQaPshpEeLqMsNFAUw1Q?plead=please-dont-download-this-or-our-lawyers-wont-let-us-host-audio

It’s been a few weeks – how about another DYNAMITE HEMORRHAGE RADIO PODCAST, what do you say? This is the nineteenth edition (#19), and this time around I’ve got some stunning new stuff from RUBY PINS, THE AR-KAICS, SIMPLE CIRCUIT, SKINNY GIRL DIET and CONSTANT MONGREL. It’s about an hour, all told. The older material includes a lot of daffy, developmentally-delayed rocknroll this time around, including messed-up sideways punk from The Silver, The Panics, Art Phag, The Keggs and The Riptoids. Then there’s stuff from Black Flag, SPK, The Bristols, Winterbrief, and Kitchen and the Plastic Spoons, too – so maybe that’s more your thing.

Parents may find it somewhat challenging trying to explain this music to children, so please share this with the utmost in caution. There are 18 other episodes to download as well – you’ll find those all below the playlist.

Download DYNAMITE HEMORRHAGE RADIO PODCAST #19
Stream Dynamite Hemorrhage Radio Podcast #19 on Soundcloud

Playlist:

THE RIPTOIDS – I’m Wired
RUBY PINS – Chariot
THE PLAYTHINGS – Sit Down (Stand Up)
WINTERBRIEF – Love Seat Sofa Charade
BUTTER UTTER – Soho
THE SILVER – Do You Wanna Dance
THE AR-KAICS – She Does Those Things To Me
KEGGS – To Find Out
THE BRISTOLS – The Way I Feel About You
RIGHT ON – Buried Alive
ART PHAG – A Boy and His Gun
JACKKNIFE – Teen Dance Debbie
CONSTANT MONGREL – In The Courts
THE DWARVES – Eat You To Survive
THE PANICS – I Wanna Kill My Mom
SIMPLE CIRCUIT – SOS
THE MINUTEMEN – History Lesson
BLACK FLAG – Clocked In
KITCHEN AND THE PLASTIC SPOONS – Blatta
SPK – No More
THE FUSE! – All Across The World 
ERASE ERRATA – Harvester
NUMBERS – Drunk With Pain
SKINNY GIRL DIET – Homesick

Past Shows:

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Just a reminder, as I contemplate making a new edition of this thing in the next few days, that you can download or stream my Dynamite Hemorrhage Radio Show Podcast, edition #10 – right now. It’s only an hour – the music is first-rate – the host’s a dope, but whatever! Do it! 

Download Dynamite Hemorrhage Radio Podcast #10 here.
Stream Dynamite Hemorrhage Radio Podcast on Soundcloud here.  

Track listing:

THE TYRADES – Former Airline
EDIBLE ARRANGEMENTS – Dark Water
TWELVE CUBIC FEET – Jaywalking
LOS CRIPIS – Breakfast
METROPAK – OK Let’s Go
LES BLOUSONS NOIRS – Eddy Sois Bon
CANDY HIGHWAY – Chilli Lopez
THE DWARVES – Fuckhead
TAPEWORM – Break My Face
HONEYSUCK – Snakepit (this is actually from 2012, not 2010 as stated on the ‘pod)
MYELIN SHEATHS – Half Wit
HEAD – Tireshredding
THE SHITBIRDS – Beef Bologna
VERONICA FALLS – Teenagers
PARQUET COURTS – Smart Alec Kid
CRACK UND ULTRA ECZEMA – Buddy’s A Good Boy
THE BLANK-ITS – I’m OK
THE BLIND SHAKE – Go Go 78
REVERSIBLE CORDS – Teen Orgy
GRASS WIDOW – Unbelievable
THE WENDY DARLINGS – Get Up
SPLIT ENDS – Rich With Nothing
SUPERCHARGER – Icepick
THE DEADBEATS – Let’s Shoot Maria
FURY – Flying  

Download our past shows – each about an hour:

Download Show #9
Download Show #8
Download Show #7
Download Show #6
Download Show #5 
Download Show #4
Download Show #3
Download Show #2
Download Show #1

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Hey, I got my act together and put together a new phony radio show/podcast for you this week, and it’s a brain eraser/mind blower/humdinger of a show, if you ask me. Quite a few new things to play for you this time, with the total show clocking in at just a couple minutes over 1 hour. You can stream it, you can download it – but most importantly, you can take a chance and potentially have the entire course of your life changed by it.

You’ll hear new stuff from EDIBLE ARRANGEMENTS, GRASS WIDOW, PARQUET COURTS, THE BLIND SHAKE, CANDY HIGHWAY, VERONICA FALLS and more…..and some would-be “classics” and never-weres from The Blank-Its, Reversible Chords, Crack Und Ultra Eczema, Supercharger and many more. 

Download Dynamite Hemorrhage Radio Podcast #10 here.
Stream Dynamite Hemorrhage Radio Podcast on Soundcloud here.  

Track listing:

THE TYRADES – Former Airline
EDIBLE ARRANGEMENTS – Dark Water
TWELVE CUBIC FEET – Jaywalking
LOS CRIPIS – Breakfast
METROPAK – OK Let’s Go
LES BLOUSONS NOIRS – Eddy Sois Bon
CANDY HIGHWAY – Chilli Lopez
THE DWARVES – Fuckhead
TAPEWORM – Break My Face
HONEYSUCK – Snakepit (this is actually from 2012, not 2010 as stated on the ‘pod)
MYELIN SHEATHS – Half Wit
HEAD – Tireshredding
THE SHITBIRDS – Beef Bologna
VERONICA FALLS – Teenagers
PARQUET COURTS – Smart Alec Kid
CRACK UND ULTRA ECZEMA – Buddy’s A Good Boy
THE BLANK-ITS – I’m OK
THE BLIND SHAKE – Go Go 78
REVERSIBLE CORDS – Teen Orgy
GRASS WIDOW – Unbelievable
THE WENDY DARLINGS – Get Up
SPLIT ENDS – Rich With Nothing
SUPERCHARGER – Icepick
THE DEADBEATS – Let’s Shoot Maria
FURY – Flying  

Download our past shows – each about an hour:

Download Show #9
Download Show #8
Download Show #7
Download Show #6
Download Show #5 
Download Show #4
Download Show #3
Download Show #2

Download Show #1

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The recording of 2013’s first DYNAMITE HEMORRHAGE RADIO podcast is now in the books, and it’s all ready to share with the people. This is the fourth edition of the podcast, running at about 1 hour, 15 minutes, and it will take you on a musical walkabout so mind-blowing you’ll never, ever come back. It features underground punk, pop, psych, instrumental and garage-scorch dating from about 1964 to stuff that came out a couple of weeks ago. It’s strung together just like a real radio show and everything, complete with an annoying “deejay”. Only you and I have to know that it’s totally phony, and that the guy who did it made the goddamn thing on his laptop.

Download Dynamite Hemorrhage Radio, Edition #4 

Tracks:

THE SCOUTS – Mr. Custer Stomp
MIL MASCARAS – French TV
WOUNDED LION – Black Ops
THE DWARVES – Nothing
PSYCHIC FELINE – White Walls
A-FRAMES – Electric Eye
FUZZ – This Time I Got A Reason
THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA – Coming Down
SUN CITY GIRLS – Let’s Just Lounge
BILL DIREEN AND THE BILDERS – Summer On The Nullarbor
PERE UBU – Heart of Darkness
TUNABUNNY – (Song For My) Solar Sister
CLINIC – IPC Subeditors Dictate Our Youth
VERONICA FALLS – All Eyes On You
WORLD OF POOH – Drucilla Penny
EXPANDO BRAIN – Flogging a Dead Relationship
THE SCREAMERS – Mater Dolores
THE MINUTEMEN – Clocks
MIZZ NOBODY – Smittad
T.H.E. RUTTO – Ma Vihaan
PRIESTS – Radiation
THE LINES – White Night
THE WHINES – Straybird
OLLA – Septic Hagfish
TOMMY JAY – No Place

Sound appealing? There are three more of ‘em, each about an hour long:

Download Show #3
Download Show #2
Download Show #1

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Just as San Francisco’s DWARVES were started to get some notice around the country for their mind-blowing, room-clearing 5-minute shows in the early 90s, Gerard Cosloy penned this piece in the Village Voice, which I’ve saved for over twenty years with the intention of sharing it with you on the internet today.